Perch
My heart perches on the edge of a couch,
uncomfortable with silence
desperately wanting to be filled,
So my heart sighs, and leans back just a little,
resting in moments passed and already gone,
until I am restless and anxious,
resting in stagnation,
until I can’t breathe,
and every atom within me longs to fly.
When I look down, my eyes are opened
to everything in motion all around me and in me
I realize that I’m already flying
on wings that are absolutely divine
so I perch now on the edge of a cliff.
toes curled and knees bent, anticipating
and jump off the edge in to beautiful exhilaration
and I’m alive again.
I think I forgot what it felt like to breathe
in Love in every breath,
but I have tasted what I have not seen,
and I’ll long for more and more.
like an addict never satisfied,
I’ll give more than I have.
They’ll call me crazy, but I know
what waits for me
after I’m done waiting for everything
and jump off my perch in a tree,
just a small twig
that couldn’t have been comfortable
except that I knew it was there,
waiting to break.
But I think I forgot what it felt like
to hear freedom in branches breaking
and crashing down below me
as everything I’ve ever done is left
falling with the weight of insecurity
and slipping away with guilt that kept
its slimy fingers clamped around my throat.
and when I find that I have a voice,
it cries out Hallelujah, Hallelujah,
I will praise the One who saves
all of my days,
Hallelujah all of my days.
Saturday, December 25, 2010
Monday, November 1, 2010
Facade of Ages
It's days like these,
the cloudy ones
where the wind blows through my sweater
and makes me shiver, but maybe
not from the cold.
The world holds us down,
pinned under the weight of a thousand pains.
This town tells us to stay.
And we know that if we could,
we would all just run away.
It's days like these where I can
See it in the streets,
reflecting in the windows of the shops,
not meeting my eye,
in the wooden pew,
in the other room.
Facades like a giant masquerade,
smiling, happy faces,
covering wretched grimaces of broken love,
just trying to escape.
And I can see,
we all just want to run away.
To where will you run?
In what corner of this dark world
will you take your final comfort?
In the midst of thunder, lightning, winds
that rush around me,
in the face of the Facade of Ages,
I feel whispered lies, spoken
so gently into my ear, so sweetly
I'm sick, broken, on the floor.
Yet it will be Love that holds me here,
Love that turns my determined countenance
to the storm, set in stone,
rooted and unmoved.
It will be Love like magnets
that draws my broken pieces back together,
moving in fast forward
to the silhouette of a killing cross,
on which the Son of Man suffered
for Everlasting Love
until I'm whole,
until Love's arms are the only thing I can find
into which to run.
the cloudy ones
where the wind blows through my sweater
and makes me shiver, but maybe
not from the cold.
The world holds us down,
pinned under the weight of a thousand pains.
This town tells us to stay.
And we know that if we could,
we would all just run away.
It's days like these where I can
See it in the streets,
reflecting in the windows of the shops,
not meeting my eye,
in the wooden pew,
in the other room.
Facades like a giant masquerade,
smiling, happy faces,
covering wretched grimaces of broken love,
just trying to escape.
And I can see,
we all just want to run away.
To where will you run?
In what corner of this dark world
will you take your final comfort?
In the midst of thunder, lightning, winds
that rush around me,
in the face of the Facade of Ages,
I feel whispered lies, spoken
so gently into my ear, so sweetly
I'm sick, broken, on the floor.
Yet it will be Love that holds me here,
Love that turns my determined countenance
to the storm, set in stone,
rooted and unmoved.
It will be Love like magnets
that draws my broken pieces back together,
moving in fast forward
to the silhouette of a killing cross,
on which the Son of Man suffered
for Everlasting Love
until I'm whole,
until Love's arms are the only thing I can find
into which to run.
Thursday, October 28, 2010
Over Me
1 Samuel 2:1
Then Hannah prayed and said:
"My heart rejoices in the Lord;
in the Lord my horn is lifted high.
My mouth boasts over my enemies,
for I delight in your deliverance.
There is no one holy like the Lord;
there is no one besides you;
there is no Rock like our God."
Over Me
God, you are everything.
You are jealous for my heart,
and so I give it all to you.
As Hannah once prayed,
there is no Rock like our God.
There is no one
that can dare compare to your love,
for it cannot be tamed
and your mercy falls in torrents
over me.
God, you are everything.
You are more real than anything I know,
and so I surrender my heart.
You think I am beautiful,
and you delight in me.
There is nothing
that can ever destroy your love,
for it is made of everlasting design
that this earth cannot comprehend.
And you place your love over brokenness,
over me.
God, you are God of all.
You are holy and steadfast, mighty Lord.
I will give all to serve you,
for you have laid down all for me.
There is no one besides you,
there can be no other Love I own.
Your grace catches me every moment,
and you have placed your everlasting hand
over me.
Then Hannah prayed and said:
"My heart rejoices in the Lord;
in the Lord my horn is lifted high.
My mouth boasts over my enemies,
for I delight in your deliverance.
There is no one holy like the Lord;
there is no one besides you;
there is no Rock like our God."
Over Me
God, you are everything.
You are jealous for my heart,
and so I give it all to you.
As Hannah once prayed,
there is no Rock like our God.
There is no one
that can dare compare to your love,
for it cannot be tamed
and your mercy falls in torrents
over me.
God, you are everything.
You are more real than anything I know,
and so I surrender my heart.
You think I am beautiful,
and you delight in me.
There is nothing
that can ever destroy your love,
for it is made of everlasting design
that this earth cannot comprehend.
And you place your love over brokenness,
over me.
God, you are God of all.
You are holy and steadfast, mighty Lord.
I will give all to serve you,
for you have laid down all for me.
There is no one besides you,
there can be no other Love I own.
Your grace catches me every moment,
and you have placed your everlasting hand
over me.
Friday, October 15, 2010
HOLY SPIRIT
I think that lately, God has been trying to teach me about the Holy Spirit, and I love it. In September, I was reading through John, and was really struck by some verses about the Holy Spirit, and then when I finished, I randomly decided to read 1 Corinthians, where God really pointed out the verses about his Spirit, and then last weekend in Iowa, much of what we talked about was about being filled with the Holy Spirit, which is talked about in Ephesians. So, here are the verses that have been on my heart lately!
John 14:16-19
"And I will ask the Father, and he will give you another Counselor to be with you forever--the Spirit of truth. the world cannot accept him, because it neither sees him nor knows him, but you know him, for he lives with you and will be in you. I will not leave you as orphans; I will come to you. Before long, the world will not see me anymore, but you will see me. Because I live, you will also live."
John 15:26-27
"When the Counselor comes, whom I will send to you from the Father, the Spirit of truth who goes out from the Father, he will testify about me. And you also must testify, for you have been with me from the beginning."
John 16:8-11
"When he comes, he will convict the world of guilt in regard to sin and righteousness and judgement; in regard to sin, because men do not believe in me; in regard to righteousness, because I am going to the Father, where you can see me no longer; and in regard to judgement, because the prince of this world now stands condemned."
John 16:13-15
"But when he, the Spirit of truth, comes, he will guide you into all truth. He will not speak on his own; he will speak only what he hears, and he will tell you what is yet to come. He will bring glory to me by taking from what is mine and making it known to you. All that belongs to the Father is mine. That is why I said the Spirit will take from what is mine and make it known to you."
1 Corinthians 2:10-12
"The Spirit searches all things, even the deep things of God. For who among men knows the thoughts of a man except the man's spirit within him? In the same way, no one knows the thoughts of God except the Spirit of God. We have not received the spirit of the world, but the Spirit who is from God, that we may understand what God has freely given us."
Ephesians 5:15-20
"Be very careful then, how you live--not was unwise but as wise, making the most of every opportunity because the days are evil. Therefore do not be foolish, but understand what the Lord's will is. Do not get drunk on wine, which leads to debauchery. Instead, be filled with the Spirit. Speak to one another with psalms, hymns, and spiritual songs. Sing and make music in your heart to the Lord, always giving thanks to God the Father for everything, in the name of our Lord Jesus Christ."
John 14:16-19
"And I will ask the Father, and he will give you another Counselor to be with you forever--the Spirit of truth. the world cannot accept him, because it neither sees him nor knows him, but you know him, for he lives with you and will be in you. I will not leave you as orphans; I will come to you. Before long, the world will not see me anymore, but you will see me. Because I live, you will also live."
John 15:26-27
"When the Counselor comes, whom I will send to you from the Father, the Spirit of truth who goes out from the Father, he will testify about me. And you also must testify, for you have been with me from the beginning."
John 16:8-11
"When he comes, he will convict the world of guilt in regard to sin and righteousness and judgement; in regard to sin, because men do not believe in me; in regard to righteousness, because I am going to the Father, where you can see me no longer; and in regard to judgement, because the prince of this world now stands condemned."
John 16:13-15
"But when he, the Spirit of truth, comes, he will guide you into all truth. He will not speak on his own; he will speak only what he hears, and he will tell you what is yet to come. He will bring glory to me by taking from what is mine and making it known to you. All that belongs to the Father is mine. That is why I said the Spirit will take from what is mine and make it known to you."
1 Corinthians 2:10-12
"The Spirit searches all things, even the deep things of God. For who among men knows the thoughts of a man except the man's spirit within him? In the same way, no one knows the thoughts of God except the Spirit of God. We have not received the spirit of the world, but the Spirit who is from God, that we may understand what God has freely given us."
Ephesians 5:15-20
"Be very careful then, how you live--not was unwise but as wise, making the most of every opportunity because the days are evil. Therefore do not be foolish, but understand what the Lord's will is. Do not get drunk on wine, which leads to debauchery. Instead, be filled with the Spirit. Speak to one another with psalms, hymns, and spiritual songs. Sing and make music in your heart to the Lord, always giving thanks to God the Father for everything, in the name of our Lord Jesus Christ."
Wednesday, September 22, 2010
Love Eternal
The other day, I was doing homework and feeling rather unmotivated to finish my paper, so I decided to go on a walk, and read and have some time in God's word and in prayer. And this is what God gave to me, so I wanted to share it with...whoever reads this.
Love Eternal
"Tell me your secrets,"
my Lord calls out,
"your heart is full of beauty,
I love you without doubt,
and would you but reveal
to me the depths of your longing,
I'd fill you with Love Eternal
and a knowledge of belonging."
Oh, the love of a Savior
conquers all fear,
sets me on fire,
and stays me here.
In the arms of Love Eternal
I am, finally me,
and there is one thing I know:
I was blind, but now I see.
How I tried to conquer
the darkness on my own,
but found that more surrounded,
the more I was alone.
In a crowd of the unwanted,
the diguised, and abused--
in the midst of drowning, heard,
"There is no flaw in you."
Oh, the love of my Savior
conquers spreading fears,
heals a wounded heart,
and stays me here.
In the arms of Love Eternal,
beautiful I can be,
it is the only truth I know--
I was blind, but now I see.
In the arms of Love Eternal,
I was blind, but now I see.
I found my inspiration from two places in Scripture, John 9 and Song of Songs 4:7. The love of Christ for us washes away the lies that the world wants us to believe, the lies that tell us that we aren't good enough, not strong enough, not beautiful or not "cool" enough. The Lord want us to give our hearts to him fully, to rely on him fully, trusting in him with the deepest parts of our hearts, with our fears and our insecurities. We can't do it on our own; we end up more alone and more confused than we were before. But putting our trust in the Lord never fails. I hope this was as encouraging to you as it was to me!
*also, this poem was written by me. please don't copy it without permission. thanks!
Love Eternal
"Tell me your secrets,"
my Lord calls out,
"your heart is full of beauty,
I love you without doubt,
and would you but reveal
to me the depths of your longing,
I'd fill you with Love Eternal
and a knowledge of belonging."
Oh, the love of a Savior
conquers all fear,
sets me on fire,
and stays me here.
In the arms of Love Eternal
I am, finally me,
and there is one thing I know:
I was blind, but now I see.
How I tried to conquer
the darkness on my own,
but found that more surrounded,
the more I was alone.
In a crowd of the unwanted,
the diguised, and abused--
in the midst of drowning, heard,
"There is no flaw in you."
Oh, the love of my Savior
conquers spreading fears,
heals a wounded heart,
and stays me here.
In the arms of Love Eternal,
beautiful I can be,
it is the only truth I know--
I was blind, but now I see.
In the arms of Love Eternal,
I was blind, but now I see.
I found my inspiration from two places in Scripture, John 9 and Song of Songs 4:7. The love of Christ for us washes away the lies that the world wants us to believe, the lies that tell us that we aren't good enough, not strong enough, not beautiful or not "cool" enough. The Lord want us to give our hearts to him fully, to rely on him fully, trusting in him with the deepest parts of our hearts, with our fears and our insecurities. We can't do it on our own; we end up more alone and more confused than we were before. But putting our trust in the Lord never fails. I hope this was as encouraging to you as it was to me!
*also, this poem was written by me. please don't copy it without permission. thanks!
Tuesday, September 14, 2010
WOO it's been a while...
Well it's no longer summer, which means that maybe the name of my blog doesn't really fit anymore. Maybe I'll change it. We'll see. It also means that it's been over a month since I've updated this thing...which is not good. It's not what I intended, anyway.
I don't think I'll try to update every detail of what I've learned since August, but I've learned a lot! A lot of things are different now too! Like school. Which is taking over my life. And Ekklessia (house church), which is taking over my heart. God really is doing such incredible things relationally in our house church and I'm so excited to see how much more he does even this semester! I think we've really grown together as friends and brothers and sisters in Christ, which is really incredible to me. Basically, I love it.
I've been reading a lot lately about how the Lord is the light of the world, but the world is filled with darkness, and darkness doesn't understand the light. It's strange, but I've read about this twice in the past few days in two completely different places in the Bible.
First one, John 1:3 says, "Through him all things were made, without him nothing was made that has been made. In him was life, and that life was the light of men. The light shines in the darkness, but the darkness has not understood it."
AND Isaiah 60:1-3 "Arise, shine, for your light has come, and the glory of the Lord rises upon you. See, darkness covers the earth and thick darkness is over the peoples, but the Lord rises upon you and his glory appears over you. Nations will come to your light, and kings to the brightness of your dawn."
The brokenness of this world breaks my heart, and I can see and feel the darkness all around me in my classes, in my town, in the church, everywhere. As sinful humans, we really can't escape it. But how amazing is it that the Word says that the Lord rises upon us? He has given us life that is the light of men, Jesus, and yet we still have not understood it. And yet God chooses us. He loves us, and cherishes us, and reveals himself to us. And all we must do is believe and be changed.
So in the midst of everything crazy, I guess I'm just holding on to the fact that I'm saved from the darkness of this world, and must arise, and shine, so that others can come to the brightness of His dawn.
That's all I've got...now I have to actually go do my homework. Go figure. :)
Love and peace!
Jen
I don't think I'll try to update every detail of what I've learned since August, but I've learned a lot! A lot of things are different now too! Like school. Which is taking over my life. And Ekklessia (house church), which is taking over my heart. God really is doing such incredible things relationally in our house church and I'm so excited to see how much more he does even this semester! I think we've really grown together as friends and brothers and sisters in Christ, which is really incredible to me. Basically, I love it.
I've been reading a lot lately about how the Lord is the light of the world, but the world is filled with darkness, and darkness doesn't understand the light. It's strange, but I've read about this twice in the past few days in two completely different places in the Bible.
First one, John 1:3 says, "Through him all things were made, without him nothing was made that has been made. In him was life, and that life was the light of men. The light shines in the darkness, but the darkness has not understood it."
AND Isaiah 60:1-3 "Arise, shine, for your light has come, and the glory of the Lord rises upon you. See, darkness covers the earth and thick darkness is over the peoples, but the Lord rises upon you and his glory appears over you. Nations will come to your light, and kings to the brightness of your dawn."
The brokenness of this world breaks my heart, and I can see and feel the darkness all around me in my classes, in my town, in the church, everywhere. As sinful humans, we really can't escape it. But how amazing is it that the Word says that the Lord rises upon us? He has given us life that is the light of men, Jesus, and yet we still have not understood it. And yet God chooses us. He loves us, and cherishes us, and reveals himself to us. And all we must do is believe and be changed.
So in the midst of everything crazy, I guess I'm just holding on to the fact that I'm saved from the darkness of this world, and must arise, and shine, so that others can come to the brightness of His dawn.
That's all I've got...now I have to actually go do my homework. Go figure. :)
Love and peace!
Jen
Thursday, August 5, 2010
Crazy Times and Lessons in Humility
Well, clearly I haven't done a good job of keeping this blog up to date! Unfortunately, or fortunately, I've been REALLY busy lately. I went home to Kansas City to see my family and friends, moved to a new house on the other side of campus, and have been spending lots and lots of time at church events and hanging out with friends, learning about God and this life he's given me. I finished reading Ezekiel, and if you haven't read it, you should! It's really incredible how God has brought us out of our sinful and helpless state to a place where we are free and clean and forgiven. So, needing something to read, I decided to move to the New Testament and started to read Matthew. I've been really enjoying reading Jesus' words and teachings and seeing how people reacted to him then and how I can apply that to my life now.
Matthew 18:3-4
"I tell you the truth, unless you change and become like little children, you will never enter the kingdom of heaven. Therefore, whoever humbles himself like this child is the greatest in the kingdom of heaven."
Humility has been addressed time and time again in many sermons that I've heard over the years, but it's never failed to convict me. Pride gets in the way of so many things that God wants for us, and until we can overcome pride and become humble like a child, then we're going to miss out on many of God's blessings. Just the other day, I was reading this passage in Matthew and it struck me again, how truly humble we're called to be.
But this isn't just because God says so, He calls us to this because he himself is humble. The bible says that Christ is gentle and humble in spirit. The God of the universe is humble enough to send his beloved son in human form to the earth. It's crazy to think about that.
It's also easy to think of ourselves as nothing compared to God. God is GOD. He made the universe. We are definitely very very small compared to him. But what about other people? Are we thinking of ourselves as less than those around us? Or are we keeping others down, even unintentionally, so that we are seen as better, or even more popular? I know I struggle with thinking that if I have nothing in common with someone, it's okay to just not reach out and befriend them. If you dig deep enough, there is always something you have in common with whoever you meet. Some people more than others, but showing Christ's love doesn't mean just saying hi and walking away. It means really having tough maybe awkward conversations that really show them that you're interested in who they are and what they think. It means talking to them enough to share life and share the Good News with them.
So no matter how crazy life gets, it's not our story that's the big picture. Much love amigos!
Matthew 18:3-4
"I tell you the truth, unless you change and become like little children, you will never enter the kingdom of heaven. Therefore, whoever humbles himself like this child is the greatest in the kingdom of heaven."
Humility has been addressed time and time again in many sermons that I've heard over the years, but it's never failed to convict me. Pride gets in the way of so many things that God wants for us, and until we can overcome pride and become humble like a child, then we're going to miss out on many of God's blessings. Just the other day, I was reading this passage in Matthew and it struck me again, how truly humble we're called to be.
But this isn't just because God says so, He calls us to this because he himself is humble. The bible says that Christ is gentle and humble in spirit. The God of the universe is humble enough to send his beloved son in human form to the earth. It's crazy to think about that.
It's also easy to think of ourselves as nothing compared to God. God is GOD. He made the universe. We are definitely very very small compared to him. But what about other people? Are we thinking of ourselves as less than those around us? Or are we keeping others down, even unintentionally, so that we are seen as better, or even more popular? I know I struggle with thinking that if I have nothing in common with someone, it's okay to just not reach out and befriend them. If you dig deep enough, there is always something you have in common with whoever you meet. Some people more than others, but showing Christ's love doesn't mean just saying hi and walking away. It means really having tough maybe awkward conversations that really show them that you're interested in who they are and what they think. It means talking to them enough to share life and share the Good News with them.
So no matter how crazy life gets, it's not our story that's the big picture. Much love amigos!
Thursday, July 8, 2010
Trust, if you Love
Trust is a big deal in every single relationship that we are in. No matter if the relationship is with our friends, our siblings, our significant others, our parents, or our God. When we can't trust another person, it's impossible to open up to them and be vulnerable, and really be loved. Tonight, I heard a message about love, and one of the verses quoted was 1 Corinthians 13:7, "[love] always protects, always trusts, always hopes, always perseveres."
In our relationships with others, it's important to trust each other to show each other that we love them. We have to trust even when we least feel like it. Most importantly, we must trust God! I was talking with a friend yesterday about how much blessing I have received from trusting God with his plan for my life. So many times I think that my plan is the best one...and it really never is. By trusting God, we show him that we love him! Love always trusts.
Time and time again I've seen people that trust in themselves alone to get a job, get married, or just start dating. I've even done it myself in the past. We trust in ourselves to figure out the best way to handle a situation or even decide on a school. And sometimes, it even turns out okay. But just okay is not what I want for my life. I want my life to scream God's power and might. I want my life story to be cool because it's so apparent what God did and I didn't do. Proverbs 3:5 says, "Trust in the Lord with all your heart, lean not on your own understanding." We as humans really don't understand much, in all honesty and humility. It's like when I was hurt by a church that was only trying to help me grow in my relationship with Christ by putting all my energy into one church. God had such a huge plan for me that I couldn't see at the time, but in trusting him, I was so blessed! Story after story reveals how much we can trust God. Joshua 1:9 says, "Have I not commanded you? Be strong and courageous. Do not be terrified; do not be discouraged, for the Lord your God will be with you wherever you go." We can really trust him, because he promised us! He will never leave us or forsake us, and he has a plan for us. He has a plan for our friendships, our future marriages or singleness, our jobs, and our hearts.
So I'm trusting God. And it's not necessarily easy, but from all I've seen and heard, its worth it. It's even commanded. So in the little and big things, trust in God, lean on him, and he will never let you fall.
In our relationships with others, it's important to trust each other to show each other that we love them. We have to trust even when we least feel like it. Most importantly, we must trust God! I was talking with a friend yesterday about how much blessing I have received from trusting God with his plan for my life. So many times I think that my plan is the best one...and it really never is. By trusting God, we show him that we love him! Love always trusts.
Time and time again I've seen people that trust in themselves alone to get a job, get married, or just start dating. I've even done it myself in the past. We trust in ourselves to figure out the best way to handle a situation or even decide on a school. And sometimes, it even turns out okay. But just okay is not what I want for my life. I want my life to scream God's power and might. I want my life story to be cool because it's so apparent what God did and I didn't do. Proverbs 3:5 says, "Trust in the Lord with all your heart, lean not on your own understanding." We as humans really don't understand much, in all honesty and humility. It's like when I was hurt by a church that was only trying to help me grow in my relationship with Christ by putting all my energy into one church. God had such a huge plan for me that I couldn't see at the time, but in trusting him, I was so blessed! Story after story reveals how much we can trust God. Joshua 1:9 says, "Have I not commanded you? Be strong and courageous. Do not be terrified; do not be discouraged, for the Lord your God will be with you wherever you go." We can really trust him, because he promised us! He will never leave us or forsake us, and he has a plan for us. He has a plan for our friendships, our future marriages or singleness, our jobs, and our hearts.
So I'm trusting God. And it's not necessarily easy, but from all I've seen and heard, its worth it. It's even commanded. So in the little and big things, trust in God, lean on him, and he will never let you fall.
Friday, July 2, 2010
What does it mean to be wise?
Well...it's July! I can't believe how fast this summer is going. Before we know it we'll all be buying school supplies like 6th graders. Well, maybe not. But I will be. Anyways, I've been SUPER busy the past week or so, thus explaining my lack of posts.
So lately, I've been reading Ezekiel. Which is crazy...if you haven't read it, you should! I'm learning so much from it. Ezekiel 11:19-20 says, "I will give them an undivided heart and put a new spirit in them; I will remove from them their heart of stone and give them a heart of flesh. Then they will follow my decrees and be careful to keep my laws. They will be my people and I will be their God." This is a really incredible promise. The people of Israel turned away from God and in the midst of their rebellion, and in the midst of his anger, he promises this. He never gives up on Israel, no matter how many times they turn their backs on Him.
But what has really caught my attention this week has been James 3:17. It says, "But the wisdom that comes from heaven is first pure; then peace-loving, considerate, submissive, full of mercy and good fruit, impartial and sincere." If we want to be wise, really wise, not wise from worldly standards, then we need to work on these things. Ok correction, I need to work on these things.
Purity of mind and spirit and attitude. Seeking peace in every situation, even when it would be easy to start and argument. Considerate of the people around us. Considerate enough to value others above ourselves. Submissive. Which doesn't have to be negative! The world has twisted the meaning of submission to mean something VERY different from how God intends submission to be. Really, submission is a beautiful way to serve and respect the people around us that are in authority. Full of mercy. Mercy for those that are lost. Mercy for those that hurt me. Mercy for those that make mistakes, just like me. Full of good fruit. There should be good fruit coming from wisdom! If we are wise, we should be able to have an affect on those around us. Our actions and attitudes should change outwardly. Impartial. We should treat all of our brothers and sisters the same. I think that we can be better friends with some people than others, but we shouldn't treat anyone with less love and acceptance just because we don't know them as well. Sincere. Oh sincerity. Not being fake with people; being okay with being myself.
Ultimately, I want to be wise. I want Godly wisdom that will make me a strong and Godly woman. I want to be all of the things that James says that wisdom from heaven looks like. And if I want that, these are the things that I must work on. Nowhere does it say that I have to know a whole bunch of random facts or even a lot of facts about one thing. James doesn't say that I have to be an intellectual to be wise. And although I do value learning, I realize that it takes a whole lot more to really be wise.
So lately, I've been reading Ezekiel. Which is crazy...if you haven't read it, you should! I'm learning so much from it. Ezekiel 11:19-20 says, "I will give them an undivided heart and put a new spirit in them; I will remove from them their heart of stone and give them a heart of flesh. Then they will follow my decrees and be careful to keep my laws. They will be my people and I will be their God." This is a really incredible promise. The people of Israel turned away from God and in the midst of their rebellion, and in the midst of his anger, he promises this. He never gives up on Israel, no matter how many times they turn their backs on Him.
But what has really caught my attention this week has been James 3:17. It says, "But the wisdom that comes from heaven is first pure; then peace-loving, considerate, submissive, full of mercy and good fruit, impartial and sincere." If we want to be wise, really wise, not wise from worldly standards, then we need to work on these things. Ok correction, I need to work on these things.
Purity of mind and spirit and attitude. Seeking peace in every situation, even when it would be easy to start and argument. Considerate of the people around us. Considerate enough to value others above ourselves. Submissive. Which doesn't have to be negative! The world has twisted the meaning of submission to mean something VERY different from how God intends submission to be. Really, submission is a beautiful way to serve and respect the people around us that are in authority. Full of mercy. Mercy for those that are lost. Mercy for those that hurt me. Mercy for those that make mistakes, just like me. Full of good fruit. There should be good fruit coming from wisdom! If we are wise, we should be able to have an affect on those around us. Our actions and attitudes should change outwardly. Impartial. We should treat all of our brothers and sisters the same. I think that we can be better friends with some people than others, but we shouldn't treat anyone with less love and acceptance just because we don't know them as well. Sincere. Oh sincerity. Not being fake with people; being okay with being myself.
Ultimately, I want to be wise. I want Godly wisdom that will make me a strong and Godly woman. I want to be all of the things that James says that wisdom from heaven looks like. And if I want that, these are the things that I must work on. Nowhere does it say that I have to know a whole bunch of random facts or even a lot of facts about one thing. James doesn't say that I have to be an intellectual to be wise. And although I do value learning, I realize that it takes a whole lot more to really be wise.
Friday, June 25, 2010
Remember, remember
Hey y'all! Today I'm writing from the beautiful city of Stillwater, Oklahoma, where I'm visiting my amazing younger sister. So far I'm having a great time, but I didn't want to forget about this because I wanted to share some thoughts about what I've learned this week!
On Tuesday nights at Vintage, we are watching a video series on the Christian worldview called The Truth Project. You should check it out if you can, because it's really good! I've learned so much and I haven't even been able to see all of them. So there's my plug for the Truth Project.
This past Tuesday, we learned about History. In high school, I loved history (I even considered being a history teacher, but instead I decided on English teacher). I loved learning about people and how their actions somehow affected the world enough to be put into text books. But a lot of times, we forget how exciting the history of the Bible can be. There are books and books about God's people and how God moves among them. Not only are the facts more credible than any text book, but the inspiration of what God does for his people is incredible.
But the Bible is also full of God's people forgetting what God has done for them. They believe lies and are deceived, much like we are. And much like them, we have little excuse for forgetting. They had firsthand experience of God's wonders, but we have firsthand experience, as well as the written word of God!
One of the major points of the video was that we need to remember our history, or His Story, because otherwise, we're lost. We as a people have no identity, and no wisdom to address the future. Life becomes meaningless when we only think of ourselves. But when we remember our history, God's story, then there is a past that we can learn from and apply to the future.
So, remember what God has done for us for centuries. Remember the mercy. Remember the suffering and love of Christ. Remember how he brought you out of sin and gave you a new start. I was thinking about my testimony because it's my turn to share it at our Sunday night dinners. And it reminded me of how much I owe Him. It reminded me that just "doing the right thing" isn't good enough. These things we know, but we don't always remember. So remember. Remember how far God has brought you. Look back in his word to remember His story and the beauty of the God we serve.
Peace, y'all!
Sought Out Surrender
On Tuesday nights at Vintage, we are watching a video series on the Christian worldview called The Truth Project. You should check it out if you can, because it's really good! I've learned so much and I haven't even been able to see all of them. So there's my plug for the Truth Project.
This past Tuesday, we learned about History. In high school, I loved history (I even considered being a history teacher, but instead I decided on English teacher). I loved learning about people and how their actions somehow affected the world enough to be put into text books. But a lot of times, we forget how exciting the history of the Bible can be. There are books and books about God's people and how God moves among them. Not only are the facts more credible than any text book, but the inspiration of what God does for his people is incredible.
But the Bible is also full of God's people forgetting what God has done for them. They believe lies and are deceived, much like we are. And much like them, we have little excuse for forgetting. They had firsthand experience of God's wonders, but we have firsthand experience, as well as the written word of God!
One of the major points of the video was that we need to remember our history, or His Story, because otherwise, we're lost. We as a people have no identity, and no wisdom to address the future. Life becomes meaningless when we only think of ourselves. But when we remember our history, God's story, then there is a past that we can learn from and apply to the future.
So, remember what God has done for us for centuries. Remember the mercy. Remember the suffering and love of Christ. Remember how he brought you out of sin and gave you a new start. I was thinking about my testimony because it's my turn to share it at our Sunday night dinners. And it reminded me of how much I owe Him. It reminded me that just "doing the right thing" isn't good enough. These things we know, but we don't always remember. So remember. Remember how far God has brought you. Look back in his word to remember His story and the beauty of the God we serve.
Peace, y'all!
Sought Out Surrender
Monday, June 21, 2010
Nothing Like
Lately, I've been realizing how much I've taken for granted in this life. There are still so many things that I don't realize just how blessed I am to have them. Food. Water. Money. Home. Family. Friends.
I have the best friends. They are absolutely incredible. And it pains me to think of life without them. I don't know exactly where I'd be without them. When I was young, I was hurt so badly by my friends that I was alone. Except for God. And when I turned to him, he gave me one friend. I don't find my identity or my foundation in my friends, but when I turned to God, he has in turn blessed me incredibly.
My friends, in turn, have brought me so much closer to God. They've shown me their weaknesses and their strengths and lent me strength in my own weakness. They are a blessing from God that I do not deserve. They are my sister by blood, my sisters in Christ, my brothers in Christ. They aren't just friends; they're family. And I know that I can count on them to help me through hard times. I think of how much God has used them in my life. I know that with God, I am never alone, and he has provided companionship and friendship for me through them .They are the best friends. And someday, our relationships might change with time and distance, but I know that our bond in Christ will hold us together no matter what might come our way. Friendship isn't easy, but it's worth it. It's worth every humble apology and painstaking conversation. So, the other day, I wrote this for them. About them. Love, the kind that Christ showed, is what keeps this world afloat in times of grief, sorrow, pain, suffering. Only he is truly capable of loving the way that love was made to be, but in loving like Christ as best we can, we can affect the world, one friend at a time.
Nothing Like
There's nothing like the pain
of this world,
that seeps through every crack
just like the inevitability of rain.
There's nothing like loss-
losing what you took for granted-
and it's gone, just like anything,
while gravestones hide under moss.
But then, there's nothing like the song
my heart sings-beautiful harmony
when laughing with friends
in hours short we wish were long.
Through the pain, what sets us free
is the love of One that suffered more,
and the love of the ones who know
when I want to laugh and still cry with me.
I have the best friends. They are absolutely incredible. And it pains me to think of life without them. I don't know exactly where I'd be without them. When I was young, I was hurt so badly by my friends that I was alone. Except for God. And when I turned to him, he gave me one friend. I don't find my identity or my foundation in my friends, but when I turned to God, he has in turn blessed me incredibly.
My friends, in turn, have brought me so much closer to God. They've shown me their weaknesses and their strengths and lent me strength in my own weakness. They are a blessing from God that I do not deserve. They are my sister by blood, my sisters in Christ, my brothers in Christ. They aren't just friends; they're family. And I know that I can count on them to help me through hard times. I think of how much God has used them in my life. I know that with God, I am never alone, and he has provided companionship and friendship for me through them .They are the best friends. And someday, our relationships might change with time and distance, but I know that our bond in Christ will hold us together no matter what might come our way. Friendship isn't easy, but it's worth it. It's worth every humble apology and painstaking conversation. So, the other day, I wrote this for them. About them. Love, the kind that Christ showed, is what keeps this world afloat in times of grief, sorrow, pain, suffering. Only he is truly capable of loving the way that love was made to be, but in loving like Christ as best we can, we can affect the world, one friend at a time.
Nothing Like
There's nothing like the pain
of this world,
that seeps through every crack
just like the inevitability of rain.
There's nothing like loss-
losing what you took for granted-
and it's gone, just like anything,
while gravestones hide under moss.
But then, there's nothing like the song
my heart sings-beautiful harmony
when laughing with friends
in hours short we wish were long.
Through the pain, what sets us free
is the love of One that suffered more,
and the love of the ones who know
when I want to laugh and still cry with me.
Thursday, June 17, 2010
Unfailing Love
Can you believe that God first sought us out? That we love him because he first loved us? My love for God is not of my own doing, but out a responsibility to love the One that loved me enough to die for me.
At prayer tonight, I came across Psalm 33:5 which says "The Lord loves righteousness and justice; the earth is filled with his unfailing love." God stays the same, no matter what. He is constant and unchanging, and his love never fails. As humans, we sin and fail all the time. We let down the ones we love and hurt them. I've hurt people. I've let them down. I've turned my back on God and refused the good things that he had for me out of selfish ambition and selfish desires. And yet, he still loves me. He fills the earth with his unfailing love.
And so because of his unfailing love, he sent his Son to die for us. He sent him to teach us and to save us. We are called to follow him, because he is the Way, the Truth, and the Life. And so we are called to emulate him.
Once upon a time when I played soccer, (like when I was twelve) my coach told us that he set the bar so high for us not because he wanted us to reach his extremely high expectations for us, but because when we tried to reach for his expectations, we exeeded our own. This is like what Christ does for us. Christ being perfect in every way, we can never meet his standard. We are a fallen people. But when we adhere to his laws and seek after him wholeheartedly, we give ourselves a higher standard than we could have ever thought of on our own.
So, I was also encouraged today to read 2 Timothy 2:23-24. "Don't have anything to do with foolish or stupid arguments, because you know they produce quarrels. and the Lord's servant must not quarrel; instead, he must be kind to everyone, able to teach, not resentful."
We must strive to not hurt those around us by stupid or foolish arguments and petty fights. They only tear each other down. Jesus had the most humble spirit ever, and even though he was right, he never fought with others. He only spoke the truth, and let them decide whether or not to follow him. This is what he does for us as well. His word, the Bible, is truth, and we must accept our responsibility to turn to the one that has sought us out first.
Adios con amor,
Sought Out Surrender
At prayer tonight, I came across Psalm 33:5 which says "The Lord loves righteousness and justice; the earth is filled with his unfailing love." God stays the same, no matter what. He is constant and unchanging, and his love never fails. As humans, we sin and fail all the time. We let down the ones we love and hurt them. I've hurt people. I've let them down. I've turned my back on God and refused the good things that he had for me out of selfish ambition and selfish desires. And yet, he still loves me. He fills the earth with his unfailing love.
And so because of his unfailing love, he sent his Son to die for us. He sent him to teach us and to save us. We are called to follow him, because he is the Way, the Truth, and the Life. And so we are called to emulate him.
Once upon a time when I played soccer, (like when I was twelve) my coach told us that he set the bar so high for us not because he wanted us to reach his extremely high expectations for us, but because when we tried to reach for his expectations, we exeeded our own. This is like what Christ does for us. Christ being perfect in every way, we can never meet his standard. We are a fallen people. But when we adhere to his laws and seek after him wholeheartedly, we give ourselves a higher standard than we could have ever thought of on our own.
So, I was also encouraged today to read 2 Timothy 2:23-24. "Don't have anything to do with foolish or stupid arguments, because you know they produce quarrels. and the Lord's servant must not quarrel; instead, he must be kind to everyone, able to teach, not resentful."
We must strive to not hurt those around us by stupid or foolish arguments and petty fights. They only tear each other down. Jesus had the most humble spirit ever, and even though he was right, he never fought with others. He only spoke the truth, and let them decide whether or not to follow him. This is what he does for us as well. His word, the Bible, is truth, and we must accept our responsibility to turn to the one that has sought us out first.
Adios con amor,
Sought Out Surrender
Wednesday, June 16, 2010
Rainy Afternoon Beginnings
Well, welcome to my blog! I really don't expect anyone to read this, but just in case you happen to stumble upon this page, I should let you know that this blog is just a compilation of the random thoughts, ideas, and wonderings of this summer. What is so special about this summer? Well, maybe nothing, but I am doing a summer program with my church and wanted to record and put all my thoughts about all that I'm learning together and voila! blog.
So perhaps I should start at the beginning. Not very long ago, my pastor encouraged us to look for a specific promise from God for the summer. God promises us many things, but in this instance, he wanted us to look and pray and search out what God specifically promised us for the summer. And, like I always do when God has something really good for me, I hid. I hid from the conviction to open up my Bible and my heart and really seek out what God wanted to give to me. But I was not to be left alone, and was encouraged by my roommate sharing her promise with me. So I began to pray, and ask for a promise to be revealed to me. It might sound strange, but God works in mysterious and wonderful ways.
Well, I ended up looking back through my journal and found a verse jotted down from a few months ago, that I had actually forgotten I had written down. And this time, in the midst of confusion and loneliness and simply desiring to trust God, I found Isaiah 62:12, which says, "They will be called the Holy People, the Redeemed of the Lord; and you will be called Sought Out, a City No Longer Deserted." And I knew then that this was my promise from the Lord. That he would not leave me, but instead the opposite. The promise was there that He would not only not leave me, but he would seek me out and never let me go.
He promises this to Israel, his chosen people. And I am one of his daughters, because of Christ. Because Christ came to fulfill this promise that Jerusalem would no longer be a deserted city, but Israel would be restored and rescued. Through the death of Jesus on the cross, this was accomplished! We are not left stranded, separated from God any longer, but it is recorded that the temple curtain was torn. Through Christ, we are redeemed, if we accept him as our Savior, and we become heirs of the kingdom of heaven and brothers and sisters with Christ. Which is why I say that I am a daughter of the King, and how I know that this promise is for me, and he has fulfilled it and will continue to fulfill it. When I feel most alone, or that no one really seeks out my heart, I know that God continually reaches out for me and wants me to turn to him.
So, begun on a rainy afternoon, (and ended in the sunny evening) I conclude my first blog post ever! Well, since Xanga at least...
Signing off for now!
So perhaps I should start at the beginning. Not very long ago, my pastor encouraged us to look for a specific promise from God for the summer. God promises us many things, but in this instance, he wanted us to look and pray and search out what God specifically promised us for the summer. And, like I always do when God has something really good for me, I hid. I hid from the conviction to open up my Bible and my heart and really seek out what God wanted to give to me. But I was not to be left alone, and was encouraged by my roommate sharing her promise with me. So I began to pray, and ask for a promise to be revealed to me. It might sound strange, but God works in mysterious and wonderful ways.
Well, I ended up looking back through my journal and found a verse jotted down from a few months ago, that I had actually forgotten I had written down. And this time, in the midst of confusion and loneliness and simply desiring to trust God, I found Isaiah 62:12, which says, "They will be called the Holy People, the Redeemed of the Lord; and you will be called Sought Out, a City No Longer Deserted." And I knew then that this was my promise from the Lord. That he would not leave me, but instead the opposite. The promise was there that He would not only not leave me, but he would seek me out and never let me go.
He promises this to Israel, his chosen people. And I am one of his daughters, because of Christ. Because Christ came to fulfill this promise that Jerusalem would no longer be a deserted city, but Israel would be restored and rescued. Through the death of Jesus on the cross, this was accomplished! We are not left stranded, separated from God any longer, but it is recorded that the temple curtain was torn. Through Christ, we are redeemed, if we accept him as our Savior, and we become heirs of the kingdom of heaven and brothers and sisters with Christ. Which is why I say that I am a daughter of the King, and how I know that this promise is for me, and he has fulfilled it and will continue to fulfill it. When I feel most alone, or that no one really seeks out my heart, I know that God continually reaches out for me and wants me to turn to him.
So, begun on a rainy afternoon, (and ended in the sunny evening) I conclude my first blog post ever! Well, since Xanga at least...
Signing off for now!
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